Who Goes Next?

 I was driving in our downtown area a few weeks ago and happened upon a scene that reaffirmed that people know right from wrong and what we are or aren't supposed to do.  The issue we face in our society today is more about people making the right choice and actually doing what we know is the right thing to do. In our "old city" downtown there is one main four-way intersection that is managed by a traffic light. On down main street there are a couple of four-way stop sign intersections, yet this one intersection has enough traffic to merit a red light. Well on this particular day, as I neared the intersection of Main Street and Cumberland Avenue, I noticed that the traffic light was blinking red and traffic seemed to have come to a complete stop. I was headed to a meeting and knew this could create a delay if the problem wasn't soon remedied. Just as that thought was crossing my mind traffic began flowing in a very rhythmic fashion. Without anyone saying a word the commuters began following the rules of a four-way stop intersection with cars taking turns in a clockwise rotational fashion. A smile landscaped my face as I thought about how in the midst of adversity a group of complete strangers, all with their own individual agenda, worked in harmony with each other to assure traffic didn't come to a complete stop waiting on the problem to be fixed or the arrival of a law enforcement officer to direct traffic in the same fashion as the four way stop effort that was being employed. It was comforting to see that in the face of conflict a certain level of "right" thinking prevailed. 

Why did this simple gesture of right over might grab my attention? I guess it was the fact that in an adverse setting, one where individual agendas (my meeting and not wanting to be late) could have been the driving factor in the decision about who goes next, this communal group of transit neighbors made a decision to cooperate and follow a standard rule of driving in a setting where the rule was not specifically in place. No big deal you're saying to yourself. Well maybe, yet in this world we are living in now where the emphasis is all on "me" and my agenda, it was refreshing to see the cooperative whole surpassing the egocentric choice of what is best for self on full display. 

As a society, everyone knows right from wrong. My three-year-old granddaughter knows when she is about to make the wrong choice, it just boils down to what she ultimately chooses to do. In this situation, it would have been easy for someone to have been thinking, "I've got to get to my meeting, so I'm going next regardless of where I am in the rotation because I'm going to be late if I don't!" That's fair, isn't it? Possibly nobody else in queue had somewhere they had to be and thus would be completely fine with the one taking precedence over the whole. Right? 

I'm not exactly sure where the view of the individual surpassed the betterment of the whole, but on this particular day I was encouraged by this simple gesture of selflessness. I challenge you today to put the wants or needs of someone else in front of your own agenda. A simple act of kindness, buffered by good manners and good morals can go a long way. Think it doesn't matter? I beg to differ. A random, simple act of right thinking with selfless motives made a difference to me on my morning commute, the difference you can make in another person's life today is waiting to see who goes next? 

"If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them."  James 4:17 NIV

Coach Carter

Pleasureful or Purposeful??

We are living in different times that is for sure. Now, that might be what would be considered an understatement. Just look at all the universal issues we are facing as a society today. I would dare say that there is no more than a small handful of men and women alive today that have endured a global pandemic. The influenza outbreak around 1920 may be the worst global incident in modern history. That being said, the times we are currently traversing are obviously uncharted waters. 

I personally have moved in and out, back and forth, and through over half a decade of history and I can honestly remark that I have never witnessed times such as this in regards to jobs and work in our society. Help Wanted signs have pretty much became permanent displays in almost every job sector. Incentives such as signing bonuses, days off with pay, hourly wages that far outdistance the minimum wage, and flexible scheduling to meet the employee's desires mark the competitive nature of finding an employee. 

Our educational systems have been rocked through this pandemic, forcing school systems to revisit teaching strategies, scheduling methods, attendance rules, and grading policies to meet the needs of our students, teachers, and all other educational support cast academically and also to ensure their safety. Food prices escalating, political division on the right and the left and in the middle, social media dependency, mental well-being, and on, and on, and on we could go. "For the times, they have been a-changin", to borrow a line from Mr. Dylan. 

Everyone knows times are changing, especially those of us that are inhaling oxygen and exhaling carbon monoxide. I guess what is so alarming to me in all of the change that we are experiencing is the slow methodical move towards a "me" driven society. We, and I do mean "we" as all inclusive, are at a crossroads of sorts. Are we going to be a country that covets a pleasureful lifestyle view where every decision is centered around me and how all choices are made based on what the impact on "me" personally is? I would suggest that in so many of the aforementioned "changin" times, "me" and how "I" am impacted are at the point of the arrow in origin. The question today, in my opinion, is how long do we believe a society that places self in front of service to others can endure? 

In a world that is now prone to asking "How will this impact me personally?" quicker and more frequently than "How can I make this world a better place for the next generation, for my children's children, and the world in which they will live?", it is time for each of us to stop and reflect on how we will proceed. Our personal time on this third rock from the sun is limited at best. James 4:14 NIV reminds us that, "....Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone.", so the question begs to be asked what is really important, what should keep us up at night, what will our legacy piece to this world we live in be? 

I advocate that we move ourselves away from a self-driven "pleasureful" mindset to more of an others before self, "purposeful" mentality as the driving force in our daily output of effort and energy. I fully respect and honor those that have offered their service to our country in times of war and also in peace. Their personal sacrifice was and is a choice that is made based on the desire to serve others over self. Service over self to the point of giving their life for the lives of countless others that they would or will never meet. Leaving their families, possibly never to see them again, and yet they went and they still are going today. What if the "me" mentality ruled in the hearts and minds of those that have and are defending our country? I'm pretty sure we would not be the land of the free and the home of the brave, but instead the land that once was free and once displayed bravery through sacrifice for others over self. 

I am an optimist through and through, I believe we can be better through our adversity and afflictions. I firmly believe, because I see it in the actions and plans of the students I am blessed to work with each day. So many of the young men and women that fill our classrooms want to give rather than receive. They want to work and be a productive member of society. Do they have the blueprint and road map in front of them? My thoughts say the template exists, they just need leaders to demonstrate the skills and belief system that will support them in being successful in life. And that is where you and I enter the picture. 

Earlier we established that our life here on earth is pretty much comparable to fog, here for a time and then gone. Well, even though the fog dissipates, it leaves dew. The dew sticks to the ground and provides moisture to the leaves, grass, flowers, and even mother Earth. Your legacy needs to be much like the dew from the fog, dew sticks to surfaces long after the dew is gone. If we choose to live a purposeful life the example we provide to our children, our students, and even to those we live and work with each day will build the mental fortitude associated with placing the needs of others (purposeful), over the wants of self (pleasureful). May our driving force in life be centered around this advice from the Apostle Paul, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Philippians 2:3-8. I have said it before and I will continue to say it over and over again, your life isn't about you. It is abundantly more about what you can do to impact the lives of others in a positive manner that will ultimately have a positive impact in the world in which you live. You were designed on purpose with a purpose in mind, Rick Warren coined that phrase well, the crux of the matter that you must decide for yourself is clear. Will you spend your life fixated on me, me, me and mine, mine, mine? Or, will you commit to making your life have a bigger purpose where "me" is set aside and "we" takes the main stage of life? 

“Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”
Luke 22:42

Coach Carter 

Helium Balloons

 

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that pretty much everyone has had a helium balloon on a string and either intentionally or inadvertently let it go. Once that string is out of arm's grasp it is gone! Up, up, up it goes higher and further away until it ultimately disappears out of sight. Unlike a drone that has a controller to direct where the drone goes, a helium balloon goes off to its own ultimate destination. Although we cannot control the destination of the helium balloon after we let the string go, the balloon goes nowhere unless someone first fills the balloon with helium. So, the point of this little object lesson isn't about how to negatively impact our environment and ecosystems by cutting loose helium balloons, but it is all about understanding our role in training, raising, and preparing those we are tasked to teach.

We all teach, remember that, you are a teacher. You may teach life skills to your child, you may coach a sport and teach your athletes how to play the game, or you may teach coworkers or colleagues how to maneuver your area of expertise at work. Just as with our example of the helium balloon, you have the opportunity to share your knowledge and thus fill the brain, mind, or soul of those you are teaching, but you can't determine where that student is going to go after you carry out your side of the equation. That isn't your job. Your job is to share, teach, and provide opportunities. The "learner" has to make the decisions and choices which we would refer to as the outcomes of that learning. 

Don't get hung up on outcomes, those are Gods to guide and direct. You have a specific role and after that role is fulfilled it is up to the individual to determine what they will do with the learning you provided. If we do our job the way God created us to do it, then we have fulfilled our role. If we sit back and evaluate our impact by the outcomes that we visually see then we might get discouraged. Fulfill your role, teach, coach, and lead, but don't sit back and think you are also the judge. That job has already been taken.

As a parent, grandparent, coach, teacher, and advisor I have had thousands of opportunities to support the development of young people, both my own and a plethora of other students and athletes. I have been fortunate to witness so many positive outcomes from the learns and earns, and along the way there have been myriad flops that I would prefer to change if it had been humanly possible. My job isn't to worry about the outcomes because I can't visualize God's plan for someone's life, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways." Isaiah 55:8-10. My job is to keep on doing what God has called me to do!

So, when you get discouraged by the outcomes you see as a result of your teaching/coaching, don't dwell on it too long. God has a purpose and His will, will be done. Just keep on coaching and keep on praying!

Coach Carter

Growing Pains

 We've all heard of the phenomena known as "growing pains", the idea that when a child hits a growth spurt the muscles and bones throb and ache without much relief available. Throughout my years of coaching, teaching, and parenting it seems like the kids that experience the most intense growing pains are the ones that experience a highly noticeable increase in height in a short period of time. You see a 5'1" seventh grader one day and then it seems like you see them the next day and they are 5'7" and looking at you eye to eye. Chances are, if you can get that early teen to talk to you at all, he or she will tell you that they are dealing with growing pains. 

Growth in our lives is much the same in respect to the pain that many times is associated with becoming the person we were created to be. God created you on purpose for a purpose, finding that purpose is the outcome associated with growth. Unfortunately, growth in life comes with a great deal of growing pains, called lessons learned. We all go through adversity and afflictions in life, not by choice, but instead because we are breathing oxygen. Growing pains in life are different than the muscle/bone aches we experience as children. Everyone experiences life growing pains, the problem is many people don't learn from their opportunity to "grow" and they either mask the growth with something, or they refuse to learn and thus hinder the growth experience that needs to occur. 

Sickness, loss, relational issues, financial flops, addictions, or even an unanticipated career change can all create quite a bit of growing pains. I believe we can all agree, the life experiences in the aforementioned list hurt. Physically hurt, mentally hurt, emotionally hurt, some create more pain than the others, but they all have one thing in common, they hurt. A reliable verse that I cling deeply to tells me that "Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them." Isaiah 30:20. In other words it is common to man to experience pain and suffering, we don't have to like it, but we have to choose whether we will look for the growth opportunities associated with the adversity we are experiencing, thus deepening our relationship with our Creator, or we choose to hide from the growth through our excuses, blame shifting, addictions, or abuses. 

Faith is developed. It is strengthened through trust, and made to be more flexible during times when faith may not feel like the emotion you want to express. We want revenge when we hurt, God says "vengeance is mine..." Romans 12:19. We want immediate relief when we experience pain, yet Paul proclaimed "That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties, for when I am weak then I am made strong." II Corinthians 12:9-11. That is much easier to say then it is to do for sure, but when you allow yourself to trust God, you will grow. It is inevitable, just as our muscles and bones feel the pain of physical growth, our spiritual relationship with God grows through the adversity that we endure in this current life we have been given to live.

I have asked God to make me a lifelong learner. What I must be willing to embrace is that by being a life learner, I am going to learn most of those lessons through situations and circumstances that are either uncomfortable or painful to the point of tears. You can't fathom God's plan for your life. "My plans aren’t your plans, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my plans than your plans." Isaiah 55:8-10. That being said, it is our opportunity to grow through God's plan when we are given the option to trust in Him or we choose to trust in self or things of this world that many times are destructive instead of constructive for our growth plan. 

I leave you with this today, the apostle Paul endured much pain in his adult life after he made the decision to give his life to Christ and to follow Him. Through it all he embraced the pain and allowed it to work deeply in his faith relationship with the Maker. The following scripture is a testament to the growth Paul experienced through the growing pains of life, "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things." I Corinthians 13:11. When you make the decision to trust God through the adversity and affliction, and as you turn dealing with something in life to a victory forged in perseverance and grit, the things that might break us down suddenly become the experiences that take us to the next level of leadership that we want others to encounter in life. There is victory in Christ! Grow through your life situations and circumstances, and become who you were created to be!

Growing in Christ for life, 

Coach Carter

Patience is a Virture

 

There is an old proverb that says “Patience attracts happiness; it brings near that which is far.” I remember as a young child getting so excited when September would roll in because that was when the new cartoons and television series for the upcoming fall season would be premiered on each of the broadcast stations. During the first week or so in September the TV Guide magazine would highlight each company’s night for their sneak peek into what was in store for that channels lineup. I remember thinking, "Oh I can't wait for Thursday nights at 8:30 on channel 6 for this or that show" and Saturday morning lineups would have me channel surfing between the three network channels of ABC, CBS, and NBC to make sure I wasn't going to miss a new cartoon that would be airing on Saturday mornings. Even after the premier sneak peek into each network’s fall lineup, it would still be a week or two before the shows actually started. Commercials teasing viewers about the new show were broadcast building excitement and anticipation of the drama, comedy, or variety show that was soon to air. 

Waiting on television shows is a distant memory today. It used to be that you could only find cartoons to watch on Saturday mornings. By noon on Saturday, sports began to fill the channels programming and during the week animated educational programming on PBS channel 2 was pretty much the only offer available. That gave me something to wait on, something to anticipate, something to look forward to, and something to wait on. With the introduction of cable TV, the world changed, and now with satellites and streaming services those days of waiting on a day or even a time of day to watch a show are foregone memories of those from my elder generation. So many things in life have changed in much the same way as the advent of "on demand" television viewing. Waiting in line at the drive thru behind one car seems like an inconvenience in our rush, rush world. Having to go through three or four prompts on a service phone call to ultimately reach a "real person" brings out the worst in us when we want our device fixed NOW. Waiting our turn in line, wanting to merge into the left-hand lane on the highway only to have a "slow" car hindering the change of lanes, makes some folks irritable to the point of rage. Really?

Maybe in our goal to make things more accessible and to improve service to limit the customer's wait time, we have actually done damage to the value of patience. The idea behind the phrase, patience is a virtue, is that we grow while we wait. None of us wants to endure trials or tragedies. I do not believe we would have a large outpouring of individuals signing up for the "waiting game" in our fast food, on demand society. It appears convenience has come to mean anything that pleases me when I want to be pleased. I'd label it the "Give it to me now " generation. 

Whatever you go through in life illness, relationship pains, hardships, or trials of varying magnitudes are growth opportunities to build your patience capacity. Nobody is saying that those situations are made easier because you all of a sudden take on the mindset that I'm growing through this situation in my life, but when you begin to understand that what God wants to do through you is bigger than what is happening to you at the particular moment is life changing. What we are struggling with, suddenly becomes what we are learning through or where we are headed due to the life situations we endure. Patience doesn't make the hurt easier when we are suffering, it just makes us lean on our faith and build our trust in the One that made us for "such a time as this" Esther 4:14. 

Picking fruits and vegetables from a garden provides a rewarding meal of which a restaurant can't compare. The produce of the garden must first take a journey from seed to seedling, from tiny plant to a blooming vine, and finally from hard, green nubs to red, ripe, juicy fruit. The patience that it takes to see that process through makes the fruit even better when eaten. The same is true as we endure and persevere through life's trials and tribulations. Once we have learned to embrace adversity and grow in it and through it, we then will take on a totally different mindset of learning through life's trials, instead of waiting on the fix to happen magically. Grow in your struggles, don't miss out on a great opportunity to grow! "... and so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him." II Corinthians 3:18.

Gain some patience today, grow where you are and embrace the moment, who knows you may have been born for just such a time as this!

Coach Carter

Twenty Years Ago Today

Twenty years ago. In the scope of mankind, twenty years is a blink of the eye, a microscopic moment in the history of the world. Yet to the people of the United States and abroad that were either directly or indirectly impacted by the tragic events of 9/11/2001, that day will forever be recognized as the day the world got turned upside down and things will never be the same. As I write this FTM Thought today, my hope is that we will pause a moment to remember the loss on that horrific day, and then reflect on how we should be living today to its fullest extent. 

Twenty years ago today men, women, young, and old, wealthy, middle class, and those just getting by rose from their beds with plans to head to work, travel to destinations, or complete their list of "to dos" for the day. Twenty years ago today I would feel safe to say that not one of the thousands of people that lost their life on that day woke up thinking that September 11, 2001 would be their last day on this earth. I am confident that for the most part the family members, friends, and colleagues of those that lost their life on 9/11 did not wake up that morning thinking this is going to be the day that my wife, my husband, my dad, my sister, aunt, uncle, grandparent, coworker, neighbor, or friend will be taken from us. Twenty years ago today the world changed forever for the loved ones of 2,977 people that died that day. Twenty years later, the lasting cry is "Never forget", yet should that only be the rallying call to action on one day of the year? Remember the loss of September 11, 2001, but as we pay our tributes to the families of the 9/11/2001 victims, may we also remember that each day is a gift and to not live out each day to its fullest is a tragedy itself. 

Are you guilty of remarking that you'll do this or that tomorrow? Are you marking days, weeks, months, or even years off on the calendar in anticipation of a vacation, some type of anniversary, or possibly the time between you and your retirement? We should all have goals both short term and long, but more so I would suggest we need to place more significance on living the day that was given to us to live more than we need to be worrying about a tomorrow that may or may never come. We find this warning and the ensuing directive in the book of James, "Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business, and make a profit.” You do not even know what will happen tomorrow! What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord is willing, we will live and do this or that.” James 4:13-15. Today is your gift and tomorrow is yet unknown.

Several thousand innocent victims lost their lives unexpectedly twenty years ago today. Over one hundred fifty thousand Americans will lose their lives this year alone due to accidental or unexpected event circumstances. That means that on the average a little over 400 U.S. citizens will die today with no warning or predetermined cause such as disease in mind. That may not sound like a big number considering the United States is home to over three hundred million people. Yet the extensiveness of that number is insignificant to the spouses, children, and other family / friends of the 400 that will experience such a loss. 

We definitely need to remember the tragedy and loss of September 11, 2001. No question, no doubt, I will forever remember that day as long as I live. What I am suggesting is that you and I live today, September 11, 2021 as the gift that it is. I didn't get up this morning thinking "Wow, today is going to be my last day", instead I got up this morning thanking God for the gift of this day and asking Him to use me to the fullest extent that I can live this life He has given me. How can I serve, what can I do to impact the lives of others, what message of hope can I spread, and / or to what extent can I make a difference in the world I live in today? That is what I hope for each of you reading this message today. By all means book that family vacation for the summer of 2022 now, but at the same time, make a game plan for today. Knock on God's door and ask him what you can do today. Seek Him and you will be used. “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7

If for some unknown reason today were to be your "twenty years ago today" day, what will those who know you, work with you, and love you have to say about you, twenty years from now? My prayer is that you will live out each day that you are given to the fullest! Tomorrow will be amazing I'm sure, but today is the day that you have been given, rejoice and be glad in it! (Psalm 118:24)

Live today, today, not tomorrow and never forget!

Coach Carter

Just a Little Bit

As hairstyles go, I choose to go bald. I could grow my hair out in most areas of my scalp, but I decided a number of years ago that my head was round enough to go full Kojak. (For those of you that have no idea who Kojak was, Google Telly Savalas and you'll see what I'm talking about) That being said, I have to shave my head about every two to three days to keep my "hair" under control. I promise I'm going somewhere with this, hold on and stay with me just a little further!

Over the years, I've shared messages centered around some aspect of my exercise and fitness regimen, and today's Flat Tire Ministries thought will stay in that lane with a connection between my running and my bald head. You see, I head out for my morning jog/walk way before sunrise each day. For safety of self reasons, I always wear a personal head lamp to let any early morning commuters see that I am on the road and headed in their direction. The head lamp's elastic headband allows me to go hands free, so all I have to do is keep Essie on track with her lead and collar. The problem lies in the day proceeding my fresh head shave. On those days, the elastic headband slips up and down due to my slick scalp. Talk about feeling like you are on an earthquake simulator. I could go about the business of tightening up the headband when that happens, but the very next day the band fits snugly in place with no slipping or bobbing evidenced. What's the difference you may be thinking to yourself? Well it's the tiniest amount of hair stubble that is present the very next day after I have shaved. Think of it as a five o'clock shadow on my whole head. That little bit of growth makes all the difference in the world. Without rubbing a hand across my head, the growth that occurs is almost obscure to the human eye, yet for holding my headlamp in place that miniscule amount of growth makes all the difference in the world. What about our effort to make this world a little better place to live? Does it take a major overhaul of effort to make that happen? I suggest that just like a little amount of hair growth effort makes a difference with my headlamp, we too can make a difference in the world we live with just a little bit of effort. 

What if each day you made an effort to show someone a little bit of one of these attributes: compassion, humility, patience, forgiveness, or love. Just a little bit. A little more patience, a little more peace, a little more compassion, or a little more grace much like the mercy and grace God has shown to each of us. I think about road rage and how so many people are so quick to curse and honk their horns over nothing. Waiting at a red light for 5 seconds, really? What if we tried to be a little humbler and did a little bit more to recognize the efforts of others for their contributions? What would this world be like if we each just gave a little bit more of the consideration that we each and every one want others to give us? In Colossians 3:17 Paul gives this directive, "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Would something little like allowing someone else to go first in the car line take that much effort? No. Would it take much effort for you to consider others before you consider yourself? No. Would it be that hard to grant forgiveness to a family member of former friend that let you down? This one gets to a lot of people, but consider this, God forgives us when we ask Him for forgiveness regardless of our sin, God is faithful to forgive us, why do we think we should not do the same for others.

In hair growth, my head goes from slick to stubble in one day. That effort makes all the difference in keeping my headband and headlight in place. In God's Kingdom, that same bit of effort to give something to others that they might not receive anywhere else outside of the family of our Father is the little bit that you should give. 

Coach Carter