Toxic Positivity??

 

 Is there really something called toxic positivity? I was browsing through a news magazine in the waiting room of a doctor's office when I ran across an article warning of the dangers of becoming too positive, or what is labeled as “toxic positivity”. As timing would have it, about the time I started to read the article, I was interrupted by the call "Charles Carter" from the nurse standing at the entrance to the examination rooms. Although I went along with my well check visit and then hurriedly returned to my work schedule, that term "toxic positivity" kept circling around in my head. I vowed to research this phrase and see if I could find anything referencing what appeared to be an oxymoronical phrase at best. I asked myself, "How could being positive be a "toxic" experience?"

 

Over the next couple of weeks toxic positivity would creep into my head which served as a gentle nudge to Google the term and see what I could find. So here we are today, me in front of my laptop glaring at the Wikipedia definition of the concept of "toxic" positivity. "Toxic positivity is dysfunctional emotional management without the full acknowledgment of negative emotions, particularly anger and sadness." or in layman's terms, "a pressure to stay upbeat no matter how dire one's circumstance is". Seriously? I'm curious to whether Wikipedia and all the other "toxic" positivity naysayers out there have ever heard of two little words, hope and faith? 

 

Label me toxic if you like, but I believe the sun will come up each morning, rising in the east and setting in the west. My cup doesn't sit half empty, because as long as there is some level of fluid in my cup, it is nowhere near empty! And aligning myself with the teachings of the Apostle Paul in Romans 8:28 assures me that "... all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." Operative word in that verse, "all", not some things or just the good things, but ALL things work together for good, most importantly for those that are called according to God's purpose. I can grasp the understanding that those without hope may have a hard time understanding and accepting the truth that all things work together for good, yet I place my hope in my belief that God has a purpose for each life. That purpose may or may not work for the apparent good in that individual's life, but I hold strong to the word of God that "all" things will have an impact on the overall plans of God. 

 

In the face of tragedy and the immense grief that certainly accompanies traumatic events, it is hard not to ask "why" or "How is it possible?", and to ask someone to be positive in the face of any tragic loss is challenging. Ecclesiastes 3:4 assures us that there is “a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance", certainly when tragedy hits crying and mourning will happen as they should. Yet this is also the place where our faith and our hope must be solid, this is where our hope is found in trusting that if we believe that God's word is true, then somehow, some way, God's plan will be fulfilled. Hard to do? Absolutely. Virtually impossible to do without faith which produces hope? Once again, absolutely. 

 

I can't explain why bad things happen to good people. I can't point out how "all things work together for good" when I see the tragedies that devastate lives. We will not be happy, content, or satisfied when we face devastating loss, but one thing I do know. I will hold firm to the faith I have in God, which tells me that all things will ultimately work together for good according to His plans. Not a promise that things will work out for "my" good necessarily, but for good for the plans that God has in store for those who hold firm to their faith and hope in Him. With faith and hope it can still be a challenge but God's love will prevail. If that is toxic positivity then label me guilty. Without faith and hope moving forward may seem impossible. Currently there's a song out by the band Casting Crowns, Desert Road that says something to the effect of "I don't know where this is going, but I do know who holds my hand, this isn't the path I would have chosen, but I'll follow it to the end". For me, being positive isn't a choice. I have faced myriad valleys and dark tunnels in my life and they were hard, devastating at times. As I trudged forward, often feeling like I was walking in quicksand, I learned that I am not able to face adversity and affliction on my own. What a comfort it is to know I do not face life’s ups and downs on my own. Once again, I will reference the overcomer Paul who proclaimed in the face of dire uncertainty, "For when I am weak, then I am made strong" II Corinthians 12:10. I choose faith which gives me hope even in the face of adversity or affliction. Of this I am positive, "toxically" positive. 

 

“For greater is He who is in me, then he who is in the world!” I John 4:4

Coach Carter