Growing Pains

 We've all heard of the phenomena known as "growing pains", the idea that when a child hits a growth spurt the muscles and bones throb and ache without much relief available. Throughout my years of coaching, teaching, and parenting it seems like the kids that experience the most intense growing pains are the ones that experience a highly noticeable increase in height in a short period of time. You see a 5'1" seventh grader one day and then it seems like you see them the next day and they are 5'7" and looking at you eye to eye. Chances are, if you can get that early teen to talk to you at all, he or she will tell you that they are dealing with growing pains. 

Growth in our lives is much the same in respect to the pain that many times is associated with becoming the person we were created to be. God created you on purpose for a purpose, finding that purpose is the outcome associated with growth. Unfortunately, growth in life comes with a great deal of growing pains, called lessons learned. We all go through adversity and afflictions in life, not by choice, but instead because we are breathing oxygen. Growing pains in life are different than the muscle/bone aches we experience as children. Everyone experiences life growing pains, the problem is many people don't learn from their opportunity to "grow" and they either mask the growth with something, or they refuse to learn and thus hinder the growth experience that needs to occur. 

Sickness, loss, relational issues, financial flops, addictions, or even an unanticipated career change can all create quite a bit of growing pains. I believe we can all agree, the life experiences in the aforementioned list hurt. Physically hurt, mentally hurt, emotionally hurt, some create more pain than the others, but they all have one thing in common, they hurt. A reliable verse that I cling deeply to tells me that "Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them." Isaiah 30:20. In other words it is common to man to experience pain and suffering, we don't have to like it, but we have to choose whether we will look for the growth opportunities associated with the adversity we are experiencing, thus deepening our relationship with our Creator, or we choose to hide from the growth through our excuses, blame shifting, addictions, or abuses. 

Faith is developed. It is strengthened through trust, and made to be more flexible during times when faith may not feel like the emotion you want to express. We want revenge when we hurt, God says "vengeance is mine..." Romans 12:19. We want immediate relief when we experience pain, yet Paul proclaimed "That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties, for when I am weak then I am made strong." II Corinthians 12:9-11. That is much easier to say then it is to do for sure, but when you allow yourself to trust God, you will grow. It is inevitable, just as our muscles and bones feel the pain of physical growth, our spiritual relationship with God grows through the adversity that we endure in this current life we have been given to live.

I have asked God to make me a lifelong learner. What I must be willing to embrace is that by being a life learner, I am going to learn most of those lessons through situations and circumstances that are either uncomfortable or painful to the point of tears. You can't fathom God's plan for your life. "My plans aren’t your plans, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my plans than your plans." Isaiah 55:8-10. That being said, it is our opportunity to grow through God's plan when we are given the option to trust in Him or we choose to trust in self or things of this world that many times are destructive instead of constructive for our growth plan. 

I leave you with this today, the apostle Paul endured much pain in his adult life after he made the decision to give his life to Christ and to follow Him. Through it all he embraced the pain and allowed it to work deeply in his faith relationship with the Maker. The following scripture is a testament to the growth Paul experienced through the growing pains of life, "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things." I Corinthians 13:11. When you make the decision to trust God through the adversity and affliction, and as you turn dealing with something in life to a victory forged in perseverance and grit, the things that might break us down suddenly become the experiences that take us to the next level of leadership that we want others to encounter in life. There is victory in Christ! Grow through your life situations and circumstances, and become who you were created to be!

Growing in Christ for life, 

Coach Carter

Patience is a Virture

 

There is an old proverb that says “Patience attracts happiness; it brings near that which is far.” I remember as a young child getting so excited when September would roll in because that was when the new cartoons and television series for the upcoming fall season would be premiered on each of the broadcast stations. During the first week or so in September the TV Guide magazine would highlight each company’s night for their sneak peek into what was in store for that channels lineup. I remember thinking, "Oh I can't wait for Thursday nights at 8:30 on channel 6 for this or that show" and Saturday morning lineups would have me channel surfing between the three network channels of ABC, CBS, and NBC to make sure I wasn't going to miss a new cartoon that would be airing on Saturday mornings. Even after the premier sneak peek into each network’s fall lineup, it would still be a week or two before the shows actually started. Commercials teasing viewers about the new show were broadcast building excitement and anticipation of the drama, comedy, or variety show that was soon to air. 

Waiting on television shows is a distant memory today. It used to be that you could only find cartoons to watch on Saturday mornings. By noon on Saturday, sports began to fill the channels programming and during the week animated educational programming on PBS channel 2 was pretty much the only offer available. That gave me something to wait on, something to anticipate, something to look forward to, and something to wait on. With the introduction of cable TV, the world changed, and now with satellites and streaming services those days of waiting on a day or even a time of day to watch a show are foregone memories of those from my elder generation. So many things in life have changed in much the same way as the advent of "on demand" television viewing. Waiting in line at the drive thru behind one car seems like an inconvenience in our rush, rush world. Having to go through three or four prompts on a service phone call to ultimately reach a "real person" brings out the worst in us when we want our device fixed NOW. Waiting our turn in line, wanting to merge into the left-hand lane on the highway only to have a "slow" car hindering the change of lanes, makes some folks irritable to the point of rage. Really?

Maybe in our goal to make things more accessible and to improve service to limit the customer's wait time, we have actually done damage to the value of patience. The idea behind the phrase, patience is a virtue, is that we grow while we wait. None of us wants to endure trials or tragedies. I do not believe we would have a large outpouring of individuals signing up for the "waiting game" in our fast food, on demand society. It appears convenience has come to mean anything that pleases me when I want to be pleased. I'd label it the "Give it to me now " generation. 

Whatever you go through in life illness, relationship pains, hardships, or trials of varying magnitudes are growth opportunities to build your patience capacity. Nobody is saying that those situations are made easier because you all of a sudden take on the mindset that I'm growing through this situation in my life, but when you begin to understand that what God wants to do through you is bigger than what is happening to you at the particular moment is life changing. What we are struggling with, suddenly becomes what we are learning through or where we are headed due to the life situations we endure. Patience doesn't make the hurt easier when we are suffering, it just makes us lean on our faith and build our trust in the One that made us for "such a time as this" Esther 4:14. 

Picking fruits and vegetables from a garden provides a rewarding meal of which a restaurant can't compare. The produce of the garden must first take a journey from seed to seedling, from tiny plant to a blooming vine, and finally from hard, green nubs to red, ripe, juicy fruit. The patience that it takes to see that process through makes the fruit even better when eaten. The same is true as we endure and persevere through life's trials and tribulations. Once we have learned to embrace adversity and grow in it and through it, we then will take on a totally different mindset of learning through life's trials, instead of waiting on the fix to happen magically. Grow in your struggles, don't miss out on a great opportunity to grow! "... and so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him." II Corinthians 3:18.

Gain some patience today, grow where you are and embrace the moment, who knows you may have been born for just such a time as this!

Coach Carter

Twenty Years Ago Today

Twenty years ago. In the scope of mankind, twenty years is a blink of the eye, a microscopic moment in the history of the world. Yet to the people of the United States and abroad that were either directly or indirectly impacted by the tragic events of 9/11/2001, that day will forever be recognized as the day the world got turned upside down and things will never be the same. As I write this FTM Thought today, my hope is that we will pause a moment to remember the loss on that horrific day, and then reflect on how we should be living today to its fullest extent. 

Twenty years ago today men, women, young, and old, wealthy, middle class, and those just getting by rose from their beds with plans to head to work, travel to destinations, or complete their list of "to dos" for the day. Twenty years ago today I would feel safe to say that not one of the thousands of people that lost their life on that day woke up thinking that September 11, 2001 would be their last day on this earth. I am confident that for the most part the family members, friends, and colleagues of those that lost their life on 9/11 did not wake up that morning thinking this is going to be the day that my wife, my husband, my dad, my sister, aunt, uncle, grandparent, coworker, neighbor, or friend will be taken from us. Twenty years ago today the world changed forever for the loved ones of 2,977 people that died that day. Twenty years later, the lasting cry is "Never forget", yet should that only be the rallying call to action on one day of the year? Remember the loss of September 11, 2001, but as we pay our tributes to the families of the 9/11/2001 victims, may we also remember that each day is a gift and to not live out each day to its fullest is a tragedy itself. 

Are you guilty of remarking that you'll do this or that tomorrow? Are you marking days, weeks, months, or even years off on the calendar in anticipation of a vacation, some type of anniversary, or possibly the time between you and your retirement? We should all have goals both short term and long, but more so I would suggest we need to place more significance on living the day that was given to us to live more than we need to be worrying about a tomorrow that may or may never come. We find this warning and the ensuing directive in the book of James, "Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business, and make a profit.” You do not even know what will happen tomorrow! What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord is willing, we will live and do this or that.” James 4:13-15. Today is your gift and tomorrow is yet unknown.

Several thousand innocent victims lost their lives unexpectedly twenty years ago today. Over one hundred fifty thousand Americans will lose their lives this year alone due to accidental or unexpected event circumstances. That means that on the average a little over 400 U.S. citizens will die today with no warning or predetermined cause such as disease in mind. That may not sound like a big number considering the United States is home to over three hundred million people. Yet the extensiveness of that number is insignificant to the spouses, children, and other family / friends of the 400 that will experience such a loss. 

We definitely need to remember the tragedy and loss of September 11, 2001. No question, no doubt, I will forever remember that day as long as I live. What I am suggesting is that you and I live today, September 11, 2021 as the gift that it is. I didn't get up this morning thinking "Wow, today is going to be my last day", instead I got up this morning thanking God for the gift of this day and asking Him to use me to the fullest extent that I can live this life He has given me. How can I serve, what can I do to impact the lives of others, what message of hope can I spread, and / or to what extent can I make a difference in the world I live in today? That is what I hope for each of you reading this message today. By all means book that family vacation for the summer of 2022 now, but at the same time, make a game plan for today. Knock on God's door and ask him what you can do today. Seek Him and you will be used. “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7

If for some unknown reason today were to be your "twenty years ago today" day, what will those who know you, work with you, and love you have to say about you, twenty years from now? My prayer is that you will live out each day that you are given to the fullest! Tomorrow will be amazing I'm sure, but today is the day that you have been given, rejoice and be glad in it! (Psalm 118:24)

Live today, today, not tomorrow and never forget!

Coach Carter

Just a Little Bit

As hairstyles go, I choose to go bald. I could grow my hair out in most areas of my scalp, but I decided a number of years ago that my head was round enough to go full Kojak. (For those of you that have no idea who Kojak was, Google Telly Savalas and you'll see what I'm talking about) That being said, I have to shave my head about every two to three days to keep my "hair" under control. I promise I'm going somewhere with this, hold on and stay with me just a little further!

Over the years, I've shared messages centered around some aspect of my exercise and fitness regimen, and today's Flat Tire Ministries thought will stay in that lane with a connection between my running and my bald head. You see, I head out for my morning jog/walk way before sunrise each day. For safety of self reasons, I always wear a personal head lamp to let any early morning commuters see that I am on the road and headed in their direction. The head lamp's elastic headband allows me to go hands free, so all I have to do is keep Essie on track with her lead and collar. The problem lies in the day proceeding my fresh head shave. On those days, the elastic headband slips up and down due to my slick scalp. Talk about feeling like you are on an earthquake simulator. I could go about the business of tightening up the headband when that happens, but the very next day the band fits snugly in place with no slipping or bobbing evidenced. What's the difference you may be thinking to yourself? Well it's the tiniest amount of hair stubble that is present the very next day after I have shaved. Think of it as a five o'clock shadow on my whole head. That little bit of growth makes all the difference in the world. Without rubbing a hand across my head, the growth that occurs is almost obscure to the human eye, yet for holding my headlamp in place that miniscule amount of growth makes all the difference in the world. What about our effort to make this world a little better place to live? Does it take a major overhaul of effort to make that happen? I suggest that just like a little amount of hair growth effort makes a difference with my headlamp, we too can make a difference in the world we live with just a little bit of effort. 

What if each day you made an effort to show someone a little bit of one of these attributes: compassion, humility, patience, forgiveness, or love. Just a little bit. A little more patience, a little more peace, a little more compassion, or a little more grace much like the mercy and grace God has shown to each of us. I think about road rage and how so many people are so quick to curse and honk their horns over nothing. Waiting at a red light for 5 seconds, really? What if we tried to be a little humbler and did a little bit more to recognize the efforts of others for their contributions? What would this world be like if we each just gave a little bit more of the consideration that we each and every one want others to give us? In Colossians 3:17 Paul gives this directive, "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Would something little like allowing someone else to go first in the car line take that much effort? No. Would it take much effort for you to consider others before you consider yourself? No. Would it be that hard to grant forgiveness to a family member of former friend that let you down? This one gets to a lot of people, but consider this, God forgives us when we ask Him for forgiveness regardless of our sin, God is faithful to forgive us, why do we think we should not do the same for others.

In hair growth, my head goes from slick to stubble in one day. That effort makes all the difference in keeping my headband and headlight in place. In God's Kingdom, that same bit of effort to give something to others that they might not receive anywhere else outside of the family of our Father is the little bit that you should give. 

Coach Carter