We or Me?

 I believe there exists a major "Me or We" crisis in our land. The "we" side of the equation is one where "we" place the value of the whole in front of the wants of self. The "me" factor is where the rub lies, on that end of the spectrum the wants and "needs" of the individual far outweigh the good of all. In my opinion, the concern in our society is that we are fast becoming a nation of individuals looking out for old number 1 first, when in reality the purpose of our lives has very little to do with "me" and has everything to do with "we". 

I know that face coverings or "masks" are a political issue and I surely do not want this to be a political post, so in today's Flat Tire Ministry Thought, I am going to attempt to steer clear of personal and or political viewpoints and instead focus on the social context of this alarming mind shift our society has gradually morphed towards. What I see and what I hear are two distinct mindsets on the question of do we mask as a community, state, or society, or are the concerns of "me" more important and masking up is one of complete personal choice. So, keep in mind as we dig a bit deeper into today's FTM, this is not really all about masks. You can substitute pretty much anything that is going on in society and make the same cost analysis. 

Why do people choose to wear masks? Based on the guidance from national and international health agencies, the top reason that people should wear a mask is to lessen the chance of spreading the virus to others. In general, wearing a mask is not about keeping the individual from getting the virus, but instead it is more about the individual being exposed to the virus, possibly contracting the virus, and then going to home, school, or work and spreading the virus to those that the individual will come in contact with throughout the day. 

Before we go any further, for argument purposes, let's substitute the wearing a mask scenario with smoking cigarettes inside public places. Why did our society change from one that allowed people to smoke cigarettes in pretty much every public place imaginable to one where now there is hardly a public interior setting where someone would even consider it okay to lite up? Well it surely wasn't because we thought that the chances of the individual smoking would have a higher risk of developing cancer if he or she smoked in a restaurant. It was all about the risks associated with the rest of the room breathing in the second-hand smoke and the larger "we" group developing cancer. Ok? Can we agree on that comparison? So, the point to garner here is "we" do things to protect others and assure the well-being of the whole over the wants of the individual. Sure, it is inconvenient for the individual to walk outside to a safe smoking area, yet it is advantageous to the larger group for that person to do what is surely best for everyone else that chooses not to smoke. Yet I digress, let's get back to our discussion about the me or we mentality.

Do "we" know if masks make a difference? No, but agencies that have protected our citizenry from harmful or deadly situations in the past recommend the wearing of face coverings to mitigate the risks of spreading the virus. Do "we" know for a fact that wearing a face covering is a health risk for those wearing a mask? No, it may be a health risk to the individual, but again are we placing the individuals comfort before the well-being of the whole? We or me? I mean, I do not enjoy wearing a mask, but if wearing a mask is deemed beneficial and if it has the potential to help negate the spread of a virus to others I live with, work with, and share life with, does it really matter if I like to wear a mask or not? No, we wear a mask to support others before serving self. 

We should wear a face covering for our vulnerable children and grandchildren. We should choose to support wearing a face covering to protect a spouse that is more vulnerable to this deadly virus due to a health condition that you or I may not have to deal with in our "me" world. Other health compromised family members, co-workers, the individual you will meet this week for the first time, "we" should choose to wear a face covering for all of them and leave the "me" aspect out of the equation. 

On the flip side of that coin is the mindset that wearing a face covering is a "me" choice and if "me" doesn't want to wear a face covering, then "me" should not have to wear one. I get it, it is uncomfortable, it makes breathing more of a challenge for some, and the effectiveness of wearing a mask to combat the spread of this virus is still more guesstimation as opposed to scientific fact, but is wearing a face covering a decision based on how it is impacting "me" or is it about how wearing a mask potentially provides an extra layer of protection for those around me in my space each and every day?

The original premise of today's FTM was to spur you to think more about how our society has become one deeply entrenched in how something impacts "me" and less and less about how my decisions will affect the "we" in our own personal world. The more "we" place our emphasis on "me", I fear "we" are moving away from the core essential qualities that make us different from most other species on this planet. "We" must look at how our actions and choices will impact the whole of our communities, neighborhoods, schools, and workplaces. Are we to be a society that places the value of each person individually above what is best for others instead of self? Will we be a "we" society or are we destined to be all about "me"? The apostle Paul directed us to be more "we" oriented with this scripture, "Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:4 

Just as the apostle Paul directs us to place serving others at the top of our priorities, there is no other example of placing the needs of others in front of personal interests than that of Jesus. Jesus was sent to earth to be a sacrifice for others from the moment of His conception until the moment He whispered His last request, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34. Do I think Jesus was so pumped about being crucified for the very people that were shouting for Him to be sentenced to die a criminal's death? No. Scripture tells us that Jesus pleaded with His father to be spared persecution, but He relented that if being pardoned wasn't to be the case then God's will be done. (Luke 22:42). We over Me? Could there be a better example to follow? Placing the needs of others first by willingly sacrificing personal interests for the betterment of the whole group. Jesus certainly gives us a model in our society yesterday, today, and for all of our tomorrows.

Finishing where we started, this is not about wearing a mask. We as a society must decide will "we" go forward placing the needs of the whole over the demands of "me", or will "we" become the land of the "me" and place every decision in line based on the impact on me and my little world. 

 

Have I started back wearing a mask everywhere, every day? No, because I am dreading it. I don't like it, it aggravates me, and I feel like it makes me drowsy having to breathe in my own carbon dioxide as I exhale. I've seen reports of people contracting COVID-19 and they wore a mask, so I'm not sure if it even works! I don't want to increase the chances of health concerns for my children by having them wear a face covering, and I don't want to wear a mask at meetings because you can't see the other people's faces.

 The above is my own personal confession. Now go back and read the last paragraph again. How many times have you said one of these statements or something similar throughout the pandemic? Where is the emphasis in each of the statements above? They are all about "me". That is the fear I have for our society. "Me" exists to serve the "we" of our society. This is not about a mask or face covering, this is about the moral fabric of our culture. Will we continue to look only at how something impacts "me"? Or are "we" to be a country founded on the principle of "We the people...."

"Lord God Almighty, may I move myself away from a "me" first mentality and may I place the value of the whole (we) in front of my thoughts, plans, and actions. May I use your example of personal sacrifice as a guiding light to see how I should move forward today, tomorrow, and throughout this life you have given me to live serving others for you. Amen"

Coach Carter

Don't Hesitate to Motivate

 For me, I see each of us having two choices. We can either be building people up or we can spend our time intentionally or unintentionally bringing people down. Optimist or pessimist, half-full or half empty, motivator or deterrent there just isn't much left in the middle. To that point, someone may think they can be neither supportive or degrading by just staying out of the picture, but I would counter that your inaction is actually debilitating those you should be supporting and growing. So, since we have established that we are either growing a garden or we are making our rounds with the zero turn, I strongly encourage you to check your motivation gauge to determine where you are on the motivation without hesitation scale. 

I tell this story often, mainly because it is true, but more importantly because I want others to see the power in providing even the smallest amount of encouragement in someone's life. At age 23 I was about as rooted in what I was going to "grow up to be" as a tumbleweed in one of those old-timey wild west movies rolling across the screen blown by whichever direction the wind happened to be blowing. I was fortunate to be asked by a family friend, Andy Taylor, to help start middle school wrestling at East Ridge Middle School. Since wrestling had been my sport of choice in high school, I considered this a grand opportunity. After the first few years Andy moved to another school and I was able to stay on to coach with the support of Ms. Gail Rice who allowed me to pretty much be the coach of the team. The principal of the school, Glen Kanipe, came up to me one day and remarked that he thought I did a really good job working with kids and asked if I had ever considered becoming a teacher. With complete sincerity, I can firmly admit that I had never at that point considered teaching as a potential career option, but when Mr. Kanipe provided that small offer of encouragement my life would never be the same. To summarize what that little bit of encouragement ignited looks something like this. I am currently in my 30th year of being an educator and love every minute of each day I am given to work with and support student success. Close to 35 years of coaching wrestling, volleyball, and small stints as a cross country and track coach. Created Extreme Wrestling and Extreme Volleyball which has supported numerous boys and girls in their pursuit of improving their skill sets. 16 years of classroom teaching, 9 years as an elementary school principal (GO TORNADOS!!), and I am currently in my fifth year as the Director of Career and Technical Education (CTE) for our school system. In 2018, I was inducted into the College Wrestling Hall of Fame Tennessee Chapter for a lifetime of service award, and I am still coaching competitive volleyball with one of my former student/athletes in his East Tennessee Genesis Volleyball Club. All of that from a simple, short remark that charted my destiny in life. 

Hebrews 10:24 encourages us with this call to action, "Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works." What if we each took the time today to stop and encourage a child to keep trying to ride that wheelie on their bike? What if you shared with that student in your class that you have never seen anyone divide fractions as good as they do? And what if you looked for the good in those you live with, work with, or share your time each day with, and then you told them something positive and/or uplifting about their life that they can't see. What if your comment to someone turned a life around and the person went on to find a cure for the COVID-19 virus that would eradicate it from the world?
You can lift someone up with your inspiring, motivational remarks, don't stop and don't ever hesitate to motivate! "Never give up, never quit, and always give your best"

Coach Carter

 

The Trickle Up Effect

 If you've ever visited the Tennessee Aquarium in Chattanooga you've most likely been greeted by an escalator ride up to the starting point on the top level. During that ride, a number of video screens shows the formation of a river. From the first screen showing how a trickle becomes a small stream to the last screen near the top which shows a majestic, winding river, the progression never fails to impress. Just as a small drip forms a tiny trickle which ultimately forms a body of water that fuels our oceans and seas, the tiny trickle of a thought can ultimately fuel your legacy for a sea of future generations to come. 

I recently read a devotion that spurred today's FTM Thought, and the part that stuck with me so much went something like this, "Thoughts lead to beliefs, which lead to habits, which lead to character, which leads to destiny, which leads to legacy." Think about that tiny trickle of melting snow that drips down and eventually forms a small stream. As different small streams flow into a creek, that creek eventually flows into a larger tributary, that funnels into a living river, and finally at the mouth of the river an expansive ocean of opportunity exists. Sounds much like the thought pattern listed above. What starts with just a tiny drip of a thought will in one way, positively or negatively, leave a legacy for posterity.

In Proverbs 23:7 we are reminded about the power of our thoughts, "For as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he" KJV. This is so true, whatever we put into our minds and give a significant amount of our thought time becomes what we begin to believe. Watching only one "news" source such as FOX or CNN for a period of time will eventually taint the way you look at things either more conservatively or more liberally. This in turn becomes part of our belief system. If you are thinking a certain way and you don't provide yourself with a variety of sources of information, your belief system will begin to look very much like the source of what you spend your time thinking about. If we believe something we will begin to make it part of our daily walk, or in other words, a habit. Habits make us feel comfortable, we all like the familiarity of a habit because we know what to expect.  In the case of habits in our personal makeup, once we have a set of habits that we live by our character is formed. Character is a predictable action or reaction to the situations we encounter along life's journey. As our character is set then our destiny becomes visible, we begin to understand how God wants to use us, and what we should do or how we should react in pretty much all setting. The footprint of our destiny will ultimately create the legacy we leave for our children's children. 

So that brings us to the end of our Flat Tire time today, and also leaves us with an opportunity to consider what we want to spend our time thinking about possibly with a better understanding that what we spend our time thinking about ultimately trickles up or down in the shape of our beliefs, habits, character, destiny, and legacy. Question is, what do you currently spend your time thinking about, and is that going to support you in leaving a lasting legacy to your children, your siblings, your co-workers, or the world in which you live? Do you live out your day with anger, disbelief, doubt, fear, or hatred? What kind of legacy are you forming there? Is that really the world you want for your children's children? Are your thoughts centered around what you can usurp for your own personal satisfaction? Make more money, so I can buy more things, go more places, and move closer to the top of whatever the top is in your world. The more your time is spent thinking about how everything is going to impact you, the more your thoughts are going to trickle downhill. In Philippians 4:8 Paul exhorts us with this charge, "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Your thoughts are yours, you own them and therefore you can choose to think about whatever you want to think about. Keep in mind your thoughts are yours, but as they trickle down or up to the point of leaving your legacy your thoughts will impact those you share life with today, tomorrow.

Coach Carter

Distracted Driving

 

Have you ever been driving down the interstate and in front of you there is a rolling public service message that reads something along the lines of "Texting is distracted driving" or "Hands free devices only"? Sad that we have to be reminded about that, but it is reported that in the United States in 2020 approximately 1.6 million car wrecks were attributed to cell phone use. Cell phones are obviously a major distraction, while we should be focusing on the two-ton weapon of destruction that we are manipulating on the roads and highways we travel, so many of us are manipulating a phone while we are driving. If you stop and think about it there are myriad types of distractions that have the potential of taking our focus away from our driving priorities. Anything that we look at instead of the traffic around us and the road we are on qualifies as a distraction. Anything we are messing with whether we are looking at the AC controls, searching for a different song on the radio, reading a text, or as the case of the man I passed on the interstate one day that was reading the newspaper as he drove, really?? Distractions that lead to a wreck, at the minimum, delay our arrival to our destination. At their worst, distractions can lead to destruction and even death. Out of the 1.6 million wrecks associated with distracted driving, a quarter of those resulted in loss of life to the driver, passengers, or in some cases the driver in the opposite vehicle. Hence the public service message "Distracted Driving Kills".

In much the same way, anything in our day to day drive in life that takes our attention off of our destination serves as a form of "distracted driving" and ultimately can hinder us from fulfilling our purpose in life. Each of us has a purpose to fulfill, let me emphasize that again, YOU have a purpose to fulfill in life. Whether you have found your purpose in life, are searching for your purpose still, or have found your purpose and then revisited that purpose and realized you have multi-layered purposes in this life you have been given, it is ever so easy to allow distractions to pull you away from reaching your destination. 

As mentioned above visual distractions are what we typically think about when we are considering what a distraction is, but there are other types of distractions that can be just as harmful and detrimental in our journey through life. Listening to the wrong messages can be a major distraction. The news in many cases today is filled with opinions and biases to the extent that if you watch a couple of hours of "news" you may be convinced the world is about to explode. "Idle hands are the work of the devil" Proverbs 16:27 means that if we sit around with nothing to do, when will we ever make a positive impact on the world in which we live?? A fourth type of distraction would be thinking about things that are not beneficial to positive outcomes. "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8, means that when we start allowing our thoughts to focus on pleasing self, then the ultimate purpose of our lives which is to help and serve others more than self, suffers because we are now distracted.

I firmly believe that each of us has a purpose that we are to search for and then live out to the benefit of others over self. When you find your purpose, your life is transformed and you can wake up every morning knowing that you have the opportunity to make a difference in the life of someone today, each day. What you don't want to happen is to become distracted by something as subtle as a negative thought or attitude. For example, your gift in life may be that of a giver. Givers give of themselves, their time, their assets, and their knowledge and experience. If a giver gets caught up in seeing corruption from those that take advantage of the government’s assistance program that could skew the giver's mindset about helping others that so desperately need support from a caring person with the gift of giving. The distractions are real, the damage they can cause is real, and the cost that has to be paid is detrimental to others and self. 

What distractions are keeping you from focusing on your purpose in life? Do you know what your purpose is in life, or are those distractions keeping you from realizing what your true purpose in life? Have you ever considered the things that may be your "distraction"? What you prioritize in your life may very well be a distraction.  Matthew 6:24 tells us that “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Wealth, possessions, your job, your social media presence, bad attitudes, TV time, hobbies, or even an unhealthy relationship can all be distractions that may hinder you from moving closer to fulfilling your true purpose in life.

As we conclude our time together for this week, I challenge you to evaluate where you spend your time and how that time spent is either helping you to serve others or is it time used to satisfy self? We all have a purpose, some know exactly what it is and they are fully embracing it, some know what it is, but have allowed some form of distraction to slow down or stop their progress, and others have no clue what their true potential is because the distractions in their lives are doing just that distracting them from seeing who they are in God's eyes. My prayer for you regardless of where you are on your path towards self-realization is that you can identify the distractions in your life and then replace them with a commitment to serve and share. 

 Therefore, we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

Coach Carter

 

"Self"-Service

One of my favorite memories from my childhood, was jumping in Mamaw Whetsel's 1963 Ford Falcon and heading into town for groceries at the Giant grocery store. On some of those occasions we would have to first stop at CD Thomason's gas station for a fill-up. This was always a treat because CD the owner/operator offered "full-service" at his station. Full service today is a lost practice, but in the 60's and early 70's gas stations had an attendant that came out to your car and filled your tank up with the amount requested. Not only did the customer get gas, but the attendant would clean your windshield, check your oil, and even make sure your tires had the correct air pressure if requested. All of that was standard operation and was included as part of purchasing gas. From there things transitioned to something called self-service which coincided with full-service, until eventually full service became something relegated to the past. There may actually be one station in our hometown, Don's Exxon, that still offers full-service as an option to his customers. In the realm of purchasing gas, self-service makes sense. A little self-reliance doesn't hurt when it relates to being able to manage your car's maintenance, yet that is not the case in all of life.

Today we live in a "self-service" culture, meaning everything revolves around self being served. Served first, with others being thought of only if self is satisfied with the service "I" have received. Serving self has become the accepted mode of operation in our society. Look around, everything revolves around "me" and "mine".  We want our kids to come in first in any competition and if they don't well it must be somebody's fault. Adults place more value on getting than on giving which is evident in where our investments are made. The more extras we possess the "happier" we are going to be. Any inconvenience that stands in the way of me or my family is mowed down to clear the path regardless of what that means to the rest of society. Social media is a prime example of the "me" culture we live in today. The platform that was created, I guess, to bring people together has become a platform for "me" to show off who "I" am and what "I" am doing. I may be wrong, don't think I am, but I just don't believe that was God's plan when He created man in His own image. 

You see this world was created in such a fashion that we are all interconnected and we all have to have each other to progress. Being successful shouldn't be measured by how much we possess, but instead by how many people we can help along this journey of life that has been given to each of us. Matthew 6:21 provides an appropriate scripture to highlight this point, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." If our main focus is pleasing "me", then how can we ever take care of those that need us more than anything we could ever need? Throughout the Bible and throughout history, the world has and will always benefit from those that placed their own needs behind the needs of the masses. No greater example of this can be found than the example Jesus provides. Service before self could have been His epitaph, if He had remained in a grave, because His life was secondary to His life's purpose of serving others. "Not my will, but Thy will be done" Luke 22:42. The dedication to serve and save others over saving His own life is the example that I want to shape my life around, not that of anyone that places all of their efforts into the satisfaction of self as their top priority. 

This week take some time to look at your schedule. How much of your time and resources are directed at serving others, not your own children that falls into "self-serving”, then stack that up beside how much of your time is dedicated to serving your own needs or more likely wants? If that equation comes up like it may in many cases then it isn't too late to refocus our efforts and our schedule. Full-service was fun and helpful in its day, but today a little more "full" service to others before self will definitely make a difference! 

Serving God through Service to Others! 

Coach Carter