In life hard times are going to hit that is pretty much a given that we all accept, yet when they do hit us personally at just the precise moment when we are most vulnerable it is the normal human instinct to ask the question "Why me?" Well each of us has been equipped with special talents, skills, and other attributes that make you the exact person to deal with the situation at hand. Problem is many of us do not utilize those talents or attributes enough and the skill isn't honed or nurtured enough so that we are ready to put it to use during the avalanche that is happening in your life at that percise moment. The challenge is to dig deep into what is happening and force yourself to understand that what is happening may not be for your benefit and it is definitely not a punishment on your life.
What you are going through at what ever level it is, let's say anything from a literal flat tire on the roadside all the way up to the recent news of a loved one that has just been diagnosed with a terminal illness, is going to impact your life. It is also going to impact the other people in your life by the way you react and respond to the situation at hand. You will teach perseverance or you will demonstrate frustration and defeat. In illness there is faith and trust, or there is anger and fear. You have to stop and realize that how you handle the situation is going to show your circle of influence how to handle similar situations in their lives. It is imperative that we learn and realize that the events we endure and persist through in life are not meant for us necessarily, but instead for our posterity.
As a parent, coach, and also as an educator this responsibility is monumental. In your world whatever you do for a living you are going to influence others. I always tell my students and my athletes that as leaders you are going to either pull others up the mountain or you are going to push them down the mountain, then I pose the question, "which way are you going to lead?" As parents we teach lessons to our children daily on how to handle life's crises, they will see you melt or hopefully they will see you rise to the occasion and overcome the adversity that lies in front of you. You are a leader for someone in every circumstance in life you encounter. Even a complete stranger is learning a lesson from you as they observe your response to someone cutting in front of you as you drive down the freeway. How will you respond, how will you react?
It's normal to ask "Why me?" What is not the norm is when you can grow to the place of saying "Why not me?" In the Bible the apostle Paul had some type of pain in his side to the degree that he labelled it a thorn. In his prayers Paul asked the Lord to remove it three different times, basically saying "Why me?" The pain persisted, yet through his affliction Paul finally realized that when he was weak and willing then the Lord could provide him with the strength to endure and persist. The Lord spoke to Paul and helped him understand that His power is made perfect in our weakness. Once Paul got to this place in his faith then he actually said he "delighted" in hardships, persecutions, and difficulties because, " when I am weak, then I am strong" 2 Corinthians 12:10. At that point Paul was no longer asking "why me? He was now saying in response to adversity "why not me?"
Another example of this service to others before self is found as Jesus faced his inevitable death on the cross. Jesus cried as he prayed to His father and basically said "why me?", yet in that same breath he also proclaimed "yet not my will but Thy will be done" Matthew 26:39. He knew that He had been chosen for "such a time as this"Esther 4:14.
When we step up to the plate and face the challenge that we are facing with boldness and faith that we are exactly where we are because this is exactly where we are supposed to be at this given moment in life, regardless of the level of adversity or the magnitude of the circumstances we will approach the situation with a different mentality. Instead of asking "why me?" we will stand tall and accept the challenge with a "why not me?" approach that will allow us to overcome and endure. In turn our example will have an impact on all that are in our circle of influence.
I challenge you this week to change your mindset when the next flat tire comes your way (not being pessimistic at all but it will come). Stop before you think "why me" and pose yourself these questions instead. What skills do I possess that make me the perfect person to face this situation? What lesson am I to learn and what takeaways should I get from this experience? Who is watching me to see how I will react? And, What do I want those around me to see and learn from how I handle this situation? If you ask yourself these and other similar questions before you start asking "why me?" you may actually realize that you are exactly the person for this moment in time,
"for such a time as this".
Have a fantastic day and week! Meditate, reflect, and then share! Make your world better because you are in it!
Coach'em Up Carter
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