Mind Your Manners

 As a child, I can almost hear my mom telling us to always "mind your manners", especially when we would be visiting family friends or out in public where we would interact with the public in a variety of ways. Then, as an adult, I shared that same expectation with my own children. I can recall warning our kids, "When we are out to eat, you better mind your manners!" Always say please and thank you, no elbows on the table, keep your mouth closed when you are chewing, and sit up straight were just a few of the etiquette expectations mom ingrained in us as children, which in turn resulted in the given expectations for our own children. It is safe to say that manners are not automatic, our human nature would be to chomp away on those chips or crisp vegetables, and doesn't it really make it easier to eat a hamburger with both elbows serving as a stand to hold our Big Mac in place? If manners aren't taught then pretty much anything goes, so over the years the expectations of what is deemed as acceptable behaviors were formed and now we consider those to be culturally standard ways for us to behave. 

That same principle holds true in the realm of being a follower of Christ. The Apostle Paul shared a standard set of expectations for new Christians in one of his letters to the church in Ephesus. Paul knew that the primary goal was for people to accept Christ as their personal savior, and to follow His commands, but after the initial "newness" of becoming a Christian had worn off, it would be necessary to have expectations for day to day behavior in place. Paul understood that "babes" in Christ are much the same as any other child, they have to be taught what is expected. 

 

In Ephesians 4:20-32 Paul shares the "Manners 101" for anyone that has made the decision to serve Christ through the life they live. I can almost envision my mother laying down the law right before entering a fancy restaurant for a meal with some new friends. First, verses 22-24 tell us to "... put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Don't act like you used to act, when we share that we are a reborn child of God our behaviors should start changing. Put off the old and put on the new self which should favor the life Christ lived. What did the life Jesus live look like you ask? Well verses 25-32 provide the foundation for that lifestyle. Verse 25, tell the truth, don't lie. Verses 26 & 27, warns to not let your anger get the best of you, the devil has a chance to notch out a space in our hearts through our anger. Verse 28 directs us to not steal, but instead we should be working and earning to get what we need. Also, in verse 28, we are directed to give to those in need. Verse 29 tells us to not be busy bodies and spread gossip or information that has no benefit to it to be sharing. Verse 30 says "don't grieve the Holy Spirit", or in manners lingo, if it will make mommy mad don't do it! Finally, verses 31 & 32 put down the guardrails with this final admonishment, "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Get rid of the negative and fill yourself with kindness, empathy, and the same level of forgiveness that God has shown you. 

 

I fondly remember being rewarded with a dessert or toy when we properly minded our manners out in public with mom. How much more will our God justly reward us for living out the "Godly Manners" Paul shared? Myself, I pray that when I stand before my Maker I will hear these words, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.” Matthew 25:21

 

Keep those elbows off the table and a watchful eye on how we live out the life God has given us to live each day!

Coach Carter