My Little Box

 After thirty years of working in the Hamblen County School System, this past week I transitioned to a new position with the Tennessee Department of Education. I'd have to admit that it all felt a little surreal until I started moving my stuff out of the office that had been my home away from home for the last five years. I have amassed quite a library over the years which filled one large bookshelf, and took several boxes to empty the shelves of my collection of inspirational, motivational, biographical, and educational hardback and soft cover resources for growth and knowledge. But it wasn't the boxes of books that caught my attention as I trekked up and down the steps from my office to my truck bed, no what created an opportunity to reflect was one little box filled with items that most people would not give you ten bucks for at a yard sale. As I gazed down into the box that had not garnered much attention as I packed the contents, a thought crossed my mind, "After thirty years is this all I have to show for my years of service in the field of education?" After delving into the contents of that little box, I realized that instead of a little box, I had in my possession a treasure chest filled with memories I would never sale.  A trophy that my son Ethan received in fourth grade for being on the honor roll in his Aunt Donna's class at Whitesburg Elementary, a can of Beanie Weenies with a tattered label that my nephew Jacob and I toppled across as we hiked a difficult trail in southwest Virginia. (We had been conversing about being hungry and on the next switchback of the trail, we walked up on the can sitting on a rock in the middle of the trail, the expiration date on the can was my birthdate. Thank you God!) Items like the kaleidoscope the teachers at Union Heights gave me one year representing my ability to see things from multiple perspectives, and a cup full of wooden coloring pencils made to look like sticks with bark taken straight from the tree. As I reflected and grinned continuously at the contents in my little box, I had an "Aha" moment, what I had amassed over the past thirty years won't fit into a little box, and it wouldn't even fit into a semi-truck trailer. I have been blessed beyond description with treasures that will be etched in my memory for the rest of my life, and hopefully will persist into the lives of my family and countless others for years and generations to come. 

Jesus provided this advice coupled with an applicable warning "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21. The items in my little box were mementos that jogged memories, but the items themselves aren't the treasure, the true treasure can be found in the positive impact and influence I hope that I have had in the classrooms, on the wrestling mats, volleyball courts, as a principal, and most recently as a district supervisor. I treasure the opportunities that I have been entrusted with over the past three decades, so many positive reflections that they couldn't even fit in a thousand cardboard boxes! 

Treasures such as a former wrestler who approaches me with his young wrestler son explaining to him that "Coach Carter was my wrestling coach and I'll never forget the things about life that he taught me on the wrestling mat", or the vast number of current teachers who are former students of mine, my daughter Rae included, that are now educators inspiring their students to give their best and not accepting anything less. Teachers, colleagues, other educational leaders, and parents or guardians that I have served and supported through professional development opportunities, conferences, and conversations over the years are treasures that can't be enumerated or boxed for safe keeping. I truly hope that on my epitaph the inscription reads something like, "He came into this world with nothing, and left everything he gained to everyone he met." 

Have you got a box of treasures? Are they golden artifacts that will dull over time? Are you busy accumulating "things" that will tarnish and rot and won't be worth the cardboard box they will be stored in? Or will the items in your box stir up memories of the lives you have touched, the impact in your world where you live, and the legacy you will leave behind one day? Maybe it’s time for you to do a mental unpacking of your memorabilia to see what you are putting your efforts in to storing? Keep in mind that it isn't too late to change what you have been collecting. It took me almost half of my life to really realize that what I was collecting didn't have a bearing on my "happiness". When I made a shift from a "me" focused life, to a "service before self" lifestyle it changed my life forever. "My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So, I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20. What is in your little box? I'll stop here with my own little piece of advice, if you don't like what you find in your little box, then change it. You are in control of your life and what you put in your own little box!

 

Coach Carter

Who Is Your Neighbor?

 

Who is your neighbor? Is that title relegated to the people that meet the corner boundaries of your home? What if you live on a farm and there isn't anyone beside you for miles in any one direction, does that mean you don't have any neighbors? Or is it that if you live in a subdivision everyone in that "neighbor" hood is your neighbor? How about those of us that might live in an apartment complex or a set of condos, are your neighbors just the unit to your left and right and across the hall? Or are your neighbors in a housing complex every unit in your building or are they the sum total of all the buildings in an apartment complex or a high-rise tower setting? My guess is that we each would have our own preconceived notion of who our neighbors are, which leads me to the question once again, who is your neighbor?

Well our handy, dandy Webster's dictionary defines a neighbor as someone living or located near another. Merriam Webster also provides a second meaning of the word neighbor which simply put is "your fellow man". So, if your neighbor is defined as your fellow man, I suppose a similar question aptly applies, who is your fellow man? Is your fellow man the people living or located near your house? Is your fellow man the folks down the street, in your neighborhood, in your complex or tower? Does it matter where you live when it comes to defining your neighbor?

I believe it matters and I also believe we have lost the relative importance of knowing who our neighbor is and how we should be treating them. Why is it so important for us to identify who our neighbor is? Well that question was asked of Jesus back in the gospel of Luke chapter 10 and although I would assume everyone is familiar with that passage, I definitely would like to look at it for a moment. 

It is recorded that a lawyer was attempting to trip Jesus up and asked him what he would have to do to gain eternal life, Jesus answered the man with a question, "What does the law say to do?" To which the lawyer responded, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself." Luke 10:27. Jesus retorted that the esquire had answered correctly and if he would do those two things he would gain life eternal. The lawyer, frustrated but unwilling to concede, came back with a clarifying question, he said, "Who is my neighbor?" The parable Jesus uses poignantly answers the lawyer's inquiry and our Flat Tire Ministries introductory question.  "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.  So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.  But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him.  He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have." Luke 10:30-35. After sharing the parable, Jesus asked the man to tell him which of the three was the victim's neighbor, and the lawyer answered the man who showed mercy on the injured man. Jesus laid it all out there by directing the lawyer to go do the same thing as the true neighbor of the man did, thus gaining eternal life. Which brings us back to our original question, "Who is your neighbor?" By reading Jesus' parable, I would lean more towards the "fellow man" meaning more than just the person that lives in close proximity to your own home. Now, if that is the case, and if our directions from the Creator of mankind is to love our neighbor just like we love Him, then who are we to be picking and choosing who we want to claim as our neighbor.

We do not choose our neighbors, even the ones that live next door to us. The above passage makes that clear. If we are not at liberty to classify neighbor versus non-neighbor then why do we have such a hard time with loving our neighbor regardless of the hue of his skin, or any other defining characteristic for that matter? I went back and reread the words of Jesus and I didn't read anything that says to love your neighbor as long as he or she looks like, sounds like, or thinks like you do. That being said, if you believe the Bible is the true, undeniable, infallible word of God, then our neighbor is our fellow man and any judging of our fellow man should be left up to one that will judge us all (Matthew 7:1-2). Maybe it's time for a little self-reflection, maybe you and I need to look at our daily walk and analyze whether we are acting on behalf of the judge and jury on people, when in reality our only job is to love our neighbor as much as we love ourselves. May mercy, grace, and love flow through all we do this week, month, year, and may we love our "neighbors" all of them! 

Coach Carter

 

Baking a Cake

 

My four-year-old granddaughter and I enjoy baking together. Biscuits, cookies, and especially cakes are all likely candidates for a Saturday morning bake off in our kitchen. Gathering the ingredients, measuring out the flour, milk, eggs, and other essentials makes for some memorable moments plus a good place to start learning about fractions for Ella. It takes some time and a good measure of patience, but after the timer dings, and the cake cools, oh how it was worth the wait. 

Our walk in faith is much like baking a cake. And if that statement is true, then the Apostle Paul must have been a tax collector and a chef extraordinaire! The book of Ephesians is like a recipe book for us as we focus less on self and more on living a life that resembles the life Christ lived on this earth. Growing in Christ is a process just like baking a cake. You have to have the correct ingredients and then you have to be patient and committed to your relationship before you will actually mature and take on a resemblance to our God. 

In baking you have to be careful to follow the recipe ever so close, and we have the Betty Crocker recipe book of life in Ephesians 4 to follow as we make the transition from infancy to maturity in Christ. Gathering the ingredients and then following the step by step directions helps assure the cake is going to come out light, fluffy, and tasty! In our walk with Christ, Paul exhorts us to put off the old self and to be made new. The ingredients for this new self include being humble, gentle, patient, peaceful, and full of love. Just as baking a cake is a process that requires patience, the same is true in our faith. 

Accepting God as our Creator and Savior is the starting point in our walk of faith, from there we learn to be more like Christ by reading His word, spending time in prayer and devotion, and then choosing to live out our relationship each day that we are given to live. We walk by faith not by sight, which basically means our maturity becomes an internal growth that is lived out externally through our thoughts, words, and actions. 

Have you baked a cake lately? If not, I'd suggest it is time to get out the cake pans and mixing bowls and stir up the batter. Are you constantly working on your relationship with our Lord and Savior? In not, there is nothing that you could do today that would be more important. "Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him." Psalm 34:8.

Coach Carter

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

 

Throughout my life I have heard this simple riddle asked over and over again in so many settings, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" As a child it was a challenge to come up with the correct reason, it was easy to come up with many optional answers like, she saw some worms on the other side, her coop was on the other side, she saw her friends on the other side, on, and on, and on we went. All of that guess work, but in the end the answer to this riddle was so simple and direct, "she wanted to get to the other side of the street." Later in life, this simple direct child's riddle became an inquisition about life itself, why did the chicken cross the street? Why did the man just decide to do what he did? What drives you or I as we make decisions about the direction we are going in life. What is our motive behind our actions? Why do we choose to help in some instances, and walk right by in other settings where the needs are obviously the same? The question begs to be asked, "Why did you, or even better why didn't you cross the road?"

Motivation is a driver in all situations and choices that we make. Answering the "why" behind our decisions is a good place to start when evaluating what we do and the time that we invest in doing those things we do. The simple answer to our original riddle is to get to the other side of the road, but the complexity of that answer can be found in the "why" did she want to cross the road. In much the same way, asking yourself "why you do what you do?", or "why do you spend the time you spend doing the things that you do?" If we can stop and take an inventory of all the "things" we give our time and attention to, we might just realize that there is more to why the chicken crossed the road. The true complexity of the "why" in that decision may lead us to do an analysis of our "why" in the things we spend so much of our lives doing. 

Why do you work? "To pay my bills." Really? If that is your answer to that question, my friend you need to do some self-analyzing. Work does pay the bills, and paying the bills is pretty high up on the list of things that have to be done, but your answer should be so much deeper than the "getting to the other side" type of response. You represent God in your work, you make a difference in your work, and you should make sure that the difference you make in your work is a positive impact on those you work with, those you are working for, and for those that benefit from the work you do. Your work matters. Why have I spent over 35 years coaching youth sports? "I love what I do." Yeah, but, why I coach is so much deeper than that. I coach because I believe God gave me the ability to motivate and inspire others to be all they can be, sports is the vehicle that allows me to convey that message. "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me." Philippians 4:13 You should ask yourself the "Why" question in all aspects of your life and in your walk with God. Why did you cross the road? It is more complex and more intentional than just to get to the other side of the road. 

I Corinthians 10:31 tells us, "Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God." Whatever we do, wherever we find ourselves, whatever circumstance we find ourselves, "do everything for the glory of God." How we handle ourselves in our cars when the driver of the car in front of us sits a little too long when the light turns green should glorify God with our actions or reactions. How we behave when we are given a seemingly impossible goal to reach at work, is a direct reflection of how much we trust that God has a plan and His plans are so much bigger than our own. "My plans aren’t your plans, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my plans than your plans." Isaiah 55:8-9. Why do we have a family and what are you investing in the lives of those that you call your own? Is it simply because that is what a man and woman are supposed to do? Or is it because the call on your life is to impact the lives of your family so that they can go out and impact the lives of their future family and all those that they come in contact with along the way? Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ^and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely, I am with you always, to the very end of the age. “Matthew 28:18-20. What you do and why you do it matter, trust me, you are not just crossing the street to get to the other side!

Find your why, dig deep to uncover your motivation for why you do what you do. Evaluate your intentions and assure they are not just self-serving reasons that make you feel better about you. God has a plan for each of our lives, he has a purpose for you to fulfill, it is your job to find out what your purpose is today and then go fulfill it for the glory of our Risen King! 

Coach Carter

Bullseye

 

In my coaching analogies I often have relied on the image of archers and their goal of hitting the bullseye of their target. So many applicable references for hitting the bullseye, none more important than in life we are all working towards a goal, a purpose, the bullseye of our life. Specifically, in volleyball I talk about hitting the ball to a specific spot or person on the court rather than just stepping back to the service line and hitting the ball. We can all swing and hit the ball, the destination of the ball will vary dramatically, so having a laser focus on where we are hitting the ball makes for a purposeful action rather than a random motion that results in expending energy with no credible results. Hence the archer/bullseye analogy. But for today's purpose I'm not going to share as much about hitting the target, no today I'm more interested in the tension the archer has to exert on the bowstring to allow the arrow to accurately hit that elusive bullseye.

My background in archery is sparse at best, so I won't try to beguile you into thinking otherwise. Archery is a sport that combines athleticism, patience, a keen eye, and a commitment to perfection. Strong and steady are two descriptive words that come to mind when I think of an archer. The tension on the bowstring as the archer pulls back on the string requires the archer to keep the bow steady with no room for wiggles or wavering. Professional archers work with amounts of tension up to 70 lbs. of pressure as they fully engage the bowstring before it is released. That's seventy pounds of pressure being held back by one arm while steadying the bow with no shaking so that the target or bullseye can be hit with pinpoint accuracy regardless of the distance from the archer's location. The pressure on the bowstring is what allows the archer to hit his or her target. Could it be possible that the pressure we feel in our life from all the conflict, circumstances, and affliction is preparation for us so that we can hit our "bullseye" in the life we have each been given to live? 

I'm not saying that God creates the adversity in our life intentionally, but life is filled with adverse situations and it is our job to take that adversity and use it to make a better you and I out of the bad hand we feel we have been dealt. How much tension you can handle impacts how far back you can pull the bowstring of your impact on the world you live in. The old adage, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” aptly applies here. Just as the tension of the draw on the bow equals the distance and accuracy of the arrow, the more adverse situations you encounter and endure the better equipped you are to hit your purpose in God’s calling on your life. At times it most certainly feels like the string is about to snap, but an archer must stay the course and stay focused on the task at hand, the bullseye must be reached! 

God may not have you where He wants you to be, so He continues to stretch us to the point we may at times think we are about to snap. We are assured that He is with us, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 . In other words, been there, done that! Your circumstances are different from mine, my adversity is in areas that have no comparison to yours. Things may be going smoothly right now, or your life may be in an upside down turned around mess. Regardless, it is safe to say that you have been through, are currently in, or are about to enter a time of stretching your life’s bowstring. Never forget that you are not alone. When you rely on His strength, when you conceptually realize that whatever it is you are going through is not as big as our God is, then you have just increased your durability and can then be stretched just a little bit more. Your bullseye is in your sights! “Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.” Romans 15:13 

Coach Carter 

 

Better Than I Had It

Joe E. Carter was a hard worker. Simply put, I do not believe anyone that knew my dad would say anything to the contrary. As a young man he farmed, he worked in furniture factories, he tarred roofs, and supported his four brothers, sister, and mother in lieu of the fact that their father left them when dad was in seventh grade. That being the case, he quit school and instead learned the skills he would later use to run his own construction company through the work listed above. I guess you could say Joe E. Carter didn't really quit school, he just enrolled in a much different form of education entitled the school of hard knocks. During his "education" he sustained a life threatening internal injury while working at Morristown Chest, lost a digit off his right hand, survived a recession, and along the way created a construction company that built hundreds of homes in and around Morristown, transitioned to a commercial builder and oversaw the construction of numerous Western Sizzling Steakhouses in Tennessee and other states, built or partnered in a number of business ventures, and throughout his working career Joe E. Carter farmed the land that he loved so much raising livestock, crops, and lush pastureland. During his contractor tenure our dad was named "Builder of the Year" more than once, elected president by the Morristown Home Builders Association, and contributed to or helped start so many of the subdivisions established in the 1970's and 80's in Morristown such as Brockland Acres, Brentwood, Lyn Mar Hills, Hickory Shadows, and Quail Hollow, just to name a few. I believe in most definitions of the word successful Joe E. Carter would fit the bill. 

I say all of that to brag on my dad. I have always been proud of him and admired his work ethic from a distance all my life. Our father did obtain a GED diploma and he proudly wore a high school class ring throughout his life. He was prouder of that accomplishment than all of his business accolades. I mentioned the school of hard knocks in the opening of today's FTM, that is where our dad obtained his advanced degrees. His "formal" education came through undesirable life situations, myriad setbacks, stumbles, and what many people would have labelled as failures, but Joe Carter used those experiences as the fodder for success in life. 

For several generations, mine included, we have stolen the opportunity to grow through adversity from our children. Joe E. Carter wanted his children to have life better than his was, so he gave us more than we needed, and he didn't ask for much in return. My generation in turn, wanted our kids to know life  better than what we had, so we gave our children an overabundance of "things", and began removing any struggles out of the equation. That recurring theme has continued to morph over the last two or three generations until now it is pretty much a sense of entitlement by not only our children, but throughout our systems of government, education, and in everyday life. All with the thought that we want our kids "to have it better than we had it". Good intentions, terrible outcomes.

If we could just stop and look at the lives of those that we consider outstanding leaders throughout history we would find that the struggle is what made them capable of leading the way they led. I have extensively studied the adverse settings surrounding the lives of Abraham Lincoln and Winston Churchill two admirable leaders in their own era of history. In both men's lives the setbacks they endured and the "failures" they persevered made them stronger not weaker and that strength is what they each used to lead when it was time to step up to the plate and lead. I can't calculate the benefit of working through and overcoming adverse situations, but I can tell you that the struggle is definitely what made them stronger and more capable of leading their respective countries through a time of despair that saw both nations crumbling and ready to collapse. No doubt they called on their will to succeed which was bedded in resiliency and a gritty mindset, gained through adversity not entitlement. 

All is not lost, but it is time to retrieve that what has been lost. Let us fail, let us make sacrifices, and let us have to try to figure out how to make things work even when they don't end up working. Allow us to come up short and then teach us to be humble and content in whatever state we are currently in at that particular moment. "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." Philippians 4:11-12. Let us fight the good fight, stand up, get knocked down and then get back up! Make us to be a nation that relies on God not on man making everything appear to be okay. 

God prepares us through our adversity and even in our grief. What appears to be failure is only a lesson in our school of hard knocks education. I dare guess where I would be today if not for the example that Joe E. Carter provided, and I most certainly know where I would be if not for the mercy and grace that Our Savior has shown me through the trials and tribulations of this life. “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.” Joshua 1:9

Coach Carter

 

Choosing Right Over Wrong

 

The classic Abbott and Costello comedy routine of “Who’s on First” comes to mind when I read through Romans 7:15-20 “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who does it, but it is sin living in me. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” Or, if that one is a little too tricky we can sum it up with one verse from the New Living Translation of that same scripture. “I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.”

There is small consolation in the fact that the Apostle Paul, probably one of the most devote early Christians was the author of this plead for mercy and grace. Yet the fact that Paul, a man after God’s own heart faced the same dilemmas that we face some two thousand years later let’s us know that this isn’t something novel to our day and time, it is actually timeless. Adam and Eve, Joseph and his brothers, Samson and Delilah, Judas and Jesus, the list goes on and on and is definitely not limited to folks in the Bible. I guess the real question is what do you and I do about this situation in our own walk with our Heavenly Father?

The choices Paul describes are real today, just as real, if not more so as they were when Paul wrote this terse admission of guilt during his time in Rome. The question is, why is this such a problem and how do we overcome the temptations to bring our hearts, minds, and choices under submission.  

I liken this dilemma to something I have always taught the athletes I’ve coached. In any sporting endeavor, or really in any competitive situation, there will be struggles. Learning a new move, working on a certain aspect of the game you love, or facing that one opponent that seems to just have your number conflict and challenge will be present. The easy thing to do is to give up or give in, but that is monumentally the wrong thing to do. The hard thing to do is to keep fighting the urge to give in or give up. That takes will power, trust, and faith that the short-term gratification will never be able to compare with the long-range outcome if we stay the course and don’t give in. I tell my athletes, “don’t let your body tell you what to do, you be mentally stronger than your physical self and then you are the one that tells your body what to do.

Somebody out there is saying “talk to your body and tell it what to do, is this guy crazy or what?” The truth of the matter is that we are in a battle between good and evil in our minds and our mind will tell us to go or stay, to pick up and leave, or to stick it out and stay. I know what is the right thing to do, but it seems like I always end up choosing the thing I know is the wrong thing to do. Sound familiar? Sound a little like Paul?

You have to be stronger than your body and, in most cases, you have to be stronger than your intellectual mind. The strength I speak about is one that is wrought through hard, disciplined work and in most cases the fortitude of the will is a result of learning through mistakes of the past and pursuing a relationship with the One person that can give you the strength and tools you will need to overcome evil in your life.

In the Abbott and Costello skit I’m pretty sure they never really figured out who was actually on first base, but I am certain that if we attempt to make the right choices on our own the outcome will more than likely end up causing us heartaches and hardships. But, if we develop our relationship with God, nurturing it with trust, time, and faith, then we can expect our decisions to be tremendously easier to make, and the hard times a little easier to endure. “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths” Proverbs 3:5-6.

Coach Carter